Hitman: Agent 47 Review

That it begins with a big red button saying ‘upload virus’ and ends with someone being tortured for information on ‘adaptive mutation bacteriophages’ by a man with metal skin should tell you all you need to know about Agent 47. Eye-wateringly daft, this second stab at adapting the homicidal videogames doesn’t require suspension of disbelief so much as getting it drunk and stuffing it in a trunk. A buzzcut Friend squirms through exposition but delivers on destruction – Homeland’s Peter Quinn on a pissed-off rampage. Delve into the story at your own risk (sub-dermal titanium armour!), but embrace the unrepentant stupidity of it all and there’s a zen-like joy to be found in this screenvomit of adolescent violence.