Zeta-Jones Joins Chronicles

Ooooh, you said when you saw that headline. Is Catherine Zeta-Jones joining The Chronicles of Narnia? No, we're afraid not and, before you ask, she won't be traversing the underverse in the next instalment of The Chronicles of Riddick either. What she will be doing is starring in The Ivy Chronicles, a comedy/drama from Ocean's 12 producer Jerry Weintraub. Try to contain your disappointment, we're sorry she'll not be playing Aslan but you're here now so you might as well keep reading anyway. Adapted from an upcoming novel by Karen Quinn, The Ivy Chronicles is the tale of a Wall Street trader who is made redundant and then, if that weren't indignity enough, discovers her husband in bed with the wife of her replacement. Enough to drive anyone to the odd recreational spree killing we think you'll agree, but unfortunately it's not that kind of film. What the former high flyer does do, though, is set up a company to help upscale New Yorkers crowbar their spoiled, screaming pre-schoolers into the most exclusive kindergartens Manhatten has to offer. Not the obvious reaction but there you go. The film's comedic lynchpin is thankfully not going to be Zeta-Jones trying to raise her kids alone (leave that to the likes of Raising Helen), nor the daily hazards of kindergarten life (Daddy Day Care was waning enough), rather it will take the form of the clientele her business attracts, including a newspaper mogul, a mob boss and a bi-racial lesbian couple whose disabled, black, adopted child is the holy grail of every school's minority quota. Groundbreaking? Hardly, but Zeta-Jones will be red hot off the back of Ocean's 12 and Legend of Zorro so it certainly won't do her any harm.