Take Him Away

A story such as this begs for hyperbole. We could implore all resident deities to save us, declare foul magics responsible for the decision or simply bemoan in no uncertain terms the inhumanity of it all. But we're not going to do any of that because, in this case, the horror really speaks for itself. In an interview with FilmForce, Jason Statham indicated that a sequel to the Transporter may soon be visited upon his enemies. 'Luc [Besson] was very keen to do one. It's something I do want to do. I think the people like the character. I think the movie could have been better in certain areas. You know, we can definitely try and do that. I hope so." For those of you who missed it, The Transporter sees Statham as an ex-military underworld courier who gets into all manner of trouble when one package turns out to be an imperilled young lady. Eschewing plot in favour of huge explosions and laugh-in-the-face-of-physics martial arts, the film is an agony that should only be endured as part of some inebriated drinking game. Well okay, perhaps we're exaggerating how bad it is a teensy weensy bit, but a sequel? That's just not called for.